Cursed Photos Of Your Dogs

Special Galaxy Brain/Some Dogs crossover event!

Welcome to Galaxy Brain — a newsletter from Charlie Warzel. You can read what this is all about here. If you like what you see, consider forwarding it to a friend or two. You can also click the button below to subscribe. And if you’ve been reading, consider going to the paid version.

Since it’s a holiday weekend, I’m doing a bit of a crosspost here with my other newsletter, Some Dogs. It’s a blog I write about my dogs, your dogs, any dogs. It’s equal parts silly and soothing. I’m noodling on away to combine Some Dogs into Galaxy Brain while keeping both separate (Substack has sections now, I know…maybe that’s what I’ll do). If, for some reason, you subscribe to both of my newsletters, I’m very sorry for the double email…but it’s a good one.

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Hi there. Thanks for stopping by. If you are new here then let me introduce you to Peggy and Steve. You’ve now met the two most important dogs I know. Today is about what happens when the camera shutter is unkind. Let’s all take a deep breath and direct our focus on some dogs for a moment.

Peggy is an extremely photogenic dog. But, a while back, I posted a photo of Peggy that was taken at the wrong moment. Her usually regal visage was replaced by a snaggle-toothed grimace, thanks to shutter speed magic. This cursed photo is one of my favorites because it is so preposterous.

Charlie Warzel @cwarzel

I've been wanting to do this for a while but do you all have a cursed photo of your otherwise perfect dogs? This is Peggy's. If there are a bunch I'll do a dog blog of em!

In response, hundreds of people sent me their dogs in equally cursed/compromised positions. What follows is a brief taxonomy of Cursed Dog Pics.

The Black Sheep

There is always one who is sure to ruin the family photo.

Stephanie Land @stepville

@cwarzel

The School Picture Day Ruiner

Very similar to the black sheep. Nobody puts Luna in a corner.

Cyn McCrackan @cyn_mccrackan

@cwarzel Luna's reaction to the first and last time we will disrespect her so.

The Christmas Card Ruiner

Rebekah Sanderlin @rsanderlin

@cwarzel Hank was not onboard with my Christmas card idea.

Unsent Tweets @earcream

@cwarzel He was yawning

Alice Visocchi @AliceinDCland

@cwarzel Christmas brings out a lot of complicated feelings

The Surly Pirate

Blair H Cowan @BlairSatellite

@cwarzel @annehelen

There is no name for this. This photo is sent from Hell.

Some follow-up reporting revealed that our hero was “chewing on a bone... distracted by a doggo out the window. But something about the composition makes it look like our hero has swallowed a deer whole. 11/10 on the Cursed Photo Of A Glorious Beast meter.

M Prib, fmr. Impfneid sufferer @pribwalks

@cwarzel @annehelen

Shock and Awe (Or, I’ve Just Seen A Ghost)

Brian @Brian___H

@cwarzel My ol boy Baxter, he was a good boy but this photo was cursed.

It is possible Devo just witnessed an exorcism.

Emi Tice @emiponiprincess

@cwarzel Devo

The Renaissance Painting

Pure. Emotion.

emily savage tweets stuff @ItsEmilySavage

@cwarzel Double dose of demon

Kelly Hoffman @shamulou

@cwarzel

Devon Carver @perrinbar

@cwarzel @annehelen

The HRMPHHHH?

Hello, good sir.

Lindsay L Miller @lindsaylmiller

@cwarzel I woke him up from an obviously great nap

Mackie Avis @MackieAv

@cwarzel

Sweet, sweet Barlow.

Eileen Danger @TheEileenDanger

@cwarzel The usually very handsome Barlow.

Charlie Hunt 🗳 @charlesrhunt

@cwarzel Rhody is really quite handsome most of the time, but the river does strange things to him

Leigh Kunkel @saltandbitters

@cwarzel

Evan Lahti @ELahti

@cwarzel

Sometimes you accidentally look like the babadook. It’s not your fault!

AxolotlYourself @AxolotlYourself

@cwarzel @annehelen

The ‘Phone Home’

No god. Only Zuul.

Claire G. Griffin @polargriffin

@cwarzel Danny, age 13, circa 2013. 100lb husky-shepherd cross. This is shortly after he broke into a sealed plastic jar of treats and ate them all. He was very pleased.

Katie Martin @Dithyrambic

@cwarzel

The Netflix Objector

He hates your algorithm.

Leigh Kunkel @saltandbitters

@cwarzel

The Vet Indignity

Honestly, I think this just looks distinguished, tbh.

💚🦆🌹🌈🍫📚🖇🧶🧵👻 @lucyfere333

@cwarzel @annehelen Post-surgery chaps.

Duster is stoned in this one…so we don’t blame him.

Morgan 5️⃣1️⃣ Finkelstein @momofink

@cwarzel we always reference this photo of Duster high on pain meds because he looks like a celebrity on a bender caught by paparazzi (this was years ago, he’s fully recovered!)

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Ok! That’s it! Let me know if you absolutely hated this Some Dogs/Galaxy Brain crossover or if you loved it or what. Again, I’m trying to figure out a way to do both of these but not spam peoples’ inboxes. Any ideas welcome. Now go out there and enjoy your long weekend!